Have you ever met a person or watched an interview or listened to a podcast about someone and become totally enamored? When you just can’t stop thinking about this book, or movie, or concept that comes to your mind? In early 2022 I read this article and listened to this podcast interview about Miss Excel, a woman who manifested her way into creating a big business selling software training courses. I have never heard of anyone like this woman: her voice was so light and happy, she seemed so calm and confident at the young age of 28. She proclaims that Excel “lights her up” (seriously). This passion started in her young twenties, when she made her own courses to train people on Excel. Then, when the pandemic hit, she moved home with her parents and took a manifestation course. She started doing inner work to get rid of her anxiety and get in touch with her authentic self. She had a vision that she should put Excel on TikTok and told her mom to prepare for her to be famous. She went viral in 6 days and shortly thereafter quit her job to make this her full time business. She works about 15 hours per week and travels the country as a digital nomad. She has no overhead and manages her business entirely by herself. She recently earned six figures in a single day of sales.
Do you know how many business ideas I had on my yoga mat, in my 450 square foot apartment, sheltered in place, alone in North Philadelphia during the pandemic? I have been dreaming of starting my own business for years now - and I have definitely been doing my fair share of inner work. So what is the difference between Miss Excel and me? I think the difference is Miss Excel operates under the principle of “be. do. have.”
Many of my friends operate as “have. do. be”. They say that when they have enough time, they’ll take the course, or when they have enough money, they’ll buy the car they want, or when they’re skinny enough, they’ll wear the dress. I have always loathed this kind of attitude. It says, “I can’t have the thing I want because I’m making up an obstacle that doesn’t exist”. It’s a mindset that traps you in your own tracks, as if your shoes are spewing glue.
While I am guilty of using this modus operandi sometimes, my origin state is “do. have. be.” I thought that I needed to be doing things, achieving things, in order to have what I want and be happy. If I take on all the responsibilities at work, then I’ll have the title I want, then I’ll be successful. If I get married and have a kid, then I’ll have the life I want, and I’ll be fulfilled. If I take on all the emotional labor in this relationship, then I’ll have the partnership I want, then I’ll be stable. I haven’t achieved any of my goals by thinking this way - I’ve only achieved exhaustion.
It’s time to try out “Be. Do. Have.” If my goal is to start my own business, who do I have to be? How do I think? What do I eat? What do I wear?
She keeps things simple.
She tries things and fails and starts again.
She takes messy action.
She manages her energy.
She has an abundant mindset. There will always be enough for her.
She only calls in things she can handle.
She rests hard.
She puts time and care into food and nourishment.
She puts time and care into her appearance, she tells her body she looks beautiful everyday with the beautiful clothes she wears.
She curls her freaking hair in the morning! The way her hair dresser taught her to!
When she works, she enters another time and dimension. She works in a flow state because she loves it.
She loves nature and looks to the world around her for inspiration, nurture, and care.
She believes the best in people and she believes that everything will work out.
There is no room for overthinking because life is a canvas and everything we do is an experiment.
She actively and consistently expresses gratitude.
She moves her body.
She meditates.
When I wrote the beginning part of this a few months ago, I hadn’t yet opened a business, but I started embodying Miss Excel. I am proud to say that this stuff is magic. It really, really works. I opened my own consulting business in December and am launching my course on “How to Make Friends as an Adult'“. If you have enjoyed reading my newsletters, can I ask your support in spreading the news?
Share this newsletter with a friend
Follow my instagram and share my posts (really would love to go viral in 6 days)
Ask your company to invite me to speak on building relationships and friendships at work
Sign up for my class at a huge discount with the code “FIRSTFRIENDS”